The Power of Privacy

Recently, I made the mistake of oversharing. We’ve all been there. You’re talking with a friend, they give their unsolicited advice – with great intentions of course, and suddenly you find yourself overthinking, second-guessing, and overall stressed. Friend, if you’re reading this, yes you inspired this post, and I thank you, lol!

The truth of the matter is, people do not know you. They only know the extent of what you show and tell them. You can give a person every single solitary detail of your life, and they still will not know you. Let me rephrase that… they will not know your heart, your inner child – mankind simply does not have that power.

So when you share things with people who don’t know your heart or your true and original self, and they give you advice, they are ultimately advising you on things they know nothing about. I give my friends advice all the time and they never take it! You know why? Because I’m telling them to do things and it doesn’t make perfect sense, because I don’t have the full story, and I never will. Taking advice from a trusted friend can put you in a very dangerous position. Notice I didn’t say trusted source. God is our source. Sometimes God will outsource and give you the resources that you need. Your friends Sally and Johnny are not that resource – if God chooses to use them as so, He will tell you that!

The second clause of Psalms 139:2 tells us that God “understandest [our thoughts] afar off.” Again, for us new faith walkers, what does that mean? God doesn’t just know our thoughts- He understands our thoughts. If you’ve ever been misunderstood when trying to express yourself to get help, you know how disheartening that incorrect interpretation can feel. The good news is right there, God doesn’t just know all, He understands all. If you find yourself in a position of needing or wanting someone’s advice, pray about it first. Xx

New Year, New We … Hey Bestie!

Before 2022 arrives, I am making a public commitment to, well, us-me and you. You being both myself and the person reading this. I’m committing to show up consistently on The Hadaya, and to give you my best when I do. In my short 21 years of life I have endured quite a lot, and I always told myself that I would one day become the person that I needed when I was younger. And that is not to downplay or overlook my ever present village. However, as time goes on and the world changes, so should we and how we go about certain things.

I pray and hope that The Hadaya becomes a safe space for the inner black children who need it, as well as a space for those who don’t necessarily need it, but still want to be here.

Let me explain that.

I’m big on definitions. For two reasons. The first one simply being that I love to talk but I’m learning that the tongue truly has the power of life and death. The Bible says that “they that love it,” it meaning the action of using your voice, “shall eat the fruit thereof.” (Proverbs 18:21). Now if you’re like me and you’re fairly new to having your own personal relationship with God, that sentence may be confusing and overwhelming. This verse is simply telling us to be mindful of what comes out of our mouths because words hold power. Have you ever heard the phrase “you are what you eat,” as it pertains to our nutrition? Take this verse as “you are what you speak.” The second reason I like to know the exact meaning of what I say is because we live in a world where there are so many words and phrases; new ones being added each year. I feel that we the people have evolved and know so much that we assume we know what people are talking about. Take inner child for example, it sounds familiar but the phrase in actuality has nothing to do with being under 18, or being in touch with your “younger self,” as explained in psychology. Inner child is defined as a person’s supposed original or true self. So when I say that I want The Hadaya to be a safe space for the inner black child, I simply mean a safe space for your true and original self. And the black part simply because I’m a black woman and my inner child has had experiences that come with being black.

So cheers to 2022, cheers to the start and growth of The Hadaya, and cheers to the new we, bestie! Xx