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Y’ALL! I’M A WIFE! Not just any wife. I am a Godly wife. I am a holy wife. You guys do not know my story yet, but one day you will! It’s just still being written😉. 

My husband and I decided to wait until marriage to have sex, as God commands us to. We did not know that this level of commitment would immediately make us a major target for the devil. We truly became arrows for the kingdom of God together. In all of my relationships, communication has been an issue. However, it wasn’t until sex was held to its true honor, that I was able to clearly hear my partner and improve in my own shortcomings. Y’all sex outside of marriage is toxic. Your shorty is not toxic and not the problem. And contrary to popular belief-men, you aren’t either. It’s the unholy sex. Repent and watch God change your life. Or you can keep watching Him change mine 😂😂❤️❤️

Oh yeah and how about those chiefs!! We got married at 10am, and finished around 1pm, only missed half of the first quarter!! Woohoo and the biggest thanks to God!!!! ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️


The tests that life, God if you want to be real real, throws at us can be spirit breaking. They force us to see that He is the one way to victory. To get to that revelation, you have to come to a desolate place. It’s only then that one will truly learn that He is the only way. 

Let’s Talk About Trust

Hey besties! Let’s be real – trust is scary. I don’t even want to touch the subject of trusting others – can you honestly say that you trust yourself? Let’s look at the true definition:


firm belief in the reliability, truth, ability, or strength of someone or something

So again I ask, can you honestly say that you have a firm belief in the reliability, truth, ability, or strength in/of yourself? To break that down even more: do you, bestie, have a solid and almost unyielding acceptance that you can perform well in or on every occasion, or have a solid and almost unyielding acceptance that you can be truthful in or on every occasion, or have a solid and almost unyielding acceptance that you can live your life proficiently or skillfully in or on every occasion, or have a solid and almost unyielding acceptance that you can withstand great forces or pressures in or on every occasion? If you answered yes to any of those questions then I need to add a CAPTCHA test on The Hadaya’s front page to keep the robots out, OR Jesus Christ has come back again and He’s reading the blog – leave a comment if that’s You, Lord!

We are all human and we all fall short – daily. And since we’re being so honest at this moment, there are some things in the Bible – hi new faith walker, we read the Word here at The Hadaya – that are just unclear or confusing at the first glance … or the first couple of glances. And there are also very clear and specific things in the Bible at first glance that you cannot miss! The first clause of Proverbs 3:5 is one of those very clear and specific things: “Trust in the Lord with all your heart.” We live in a world where there is so much of everything: news outlets, foods, choices, opinions, people, influences, etc. There is so much of everything that it makes it hard to actually know who and what you can trust. And the truth of the matter is, you cannot trust anyone or anything. Let me use our vernacular real fast to make sure you get it: you can’t trust nothing or nobody! We left ‘periodt’ in 2021, but this a period moment: you can’t trust nothing or nobody, periodtt! And when I use the word trust, I am not referring to whatever you know trust to be – I am referring to the true definition – you cannot have a solid and almost unyielding acceptance in anything or anyone to perform well, live life proficiently or skillfully, be truthful, or withstand great forces, in any or every occasion, not even yourself! But you can, bestie, and should, and will eventually I hope and pray, trust in the Lord with all your heart. Only He can do those things, in any and every occasion. And that’s the key part: any and every occasion. No matter the position, condition, situation, and causation, He is the only one able to withstand it all, be truthful in it all, be proficient and skillful in it all, and perform well in it all. The next time you find yourself disappointed or hurt because someone broke your trust, or confused because you don’t know who or what to trust, or even catch yourself relying solely on a person or thing, remember that, and trust in the Lord with all your heart. Xx

A Woman with Brothers

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I am the youngest, and the only female, out of my siblings. I have two older brothers. I grew up in a household with two older brothers. Because of this, I easily, and cautiously, befriend guys and call them my brothers. But I recently became a woman and decided to accept a lesson I learned a very long time ago.

I had to realize that I only will ever have two older brothers. Other men will never see me, a woman, as solely their little sister. And with this realization I decided that I was not going to take this lesson and love less. This just gives me the option of having zero new older brothers but little brothers – and I will call them little brother. And as a woman, if a man cannot handle being called little brother by me, then adios. In Hispanic culture, adios is only used when saying “I won’t see you again.” Hasta luego, among similar phrases, on the other hand is used as what most Americans mean when they say bye. I love that the Hispanic cultures understand that spoken words hold power.

And to my little brothers here with me on The Hadaya, hasta luego hermanitos! Translation in case you don’t know a lick of Spanish…which you should: see you later little brothers! Xx

Also, if you find my bros attractive, the one on the left is a Completed man, and the one on the right is wearing my cousin’s clothing line – it’s the month where others take the time to recognize black history, support his clothing line! Instagram: @_dreamclothing

The Power of Privacy

Recently, I made the mistake of oversharing. We’ve all been there. You’re talking with a friend, they give their unsolicited advice – with great intentions of course, and suddenly you find yourself overthinking, second-guessing, and overall stressed. Friend, if you’re reading this, yes you inspired this post, and I thank you, lol!

The truth of the matter is, people do not know you. They only know the extent of what you show and tell them. You can give a person every single solitary detail of your life, and they still will not know you. Let me rephrase that… they will not know your heart, your inner child – mankind simply does not have that power.

So when you share things with people who don’t know your heart or your true and original self, and they give you advice, they are ultimately advising you on things they know nothing about. I give my friends advice all the time and they never take it! You know why? Because I’m telling them to do things and it doesn’t make perfect sense, because I don’t have the full story, and I never will. Taking advice from a trusted friend can put you in a very dangerous position. Notice I didn’t say trusted source. God is our source. Sometimes God will outsource and give you the resources that you need. Your friends Sally and Johnny are not that resource – if God chooses to use them as so, He will tell you that!

The second clause of Psalms 139:2 tells us that God “understandest [our thoughts] afar off.” Again, for us new faith walkers, what does that mean? God doesn’t just know our thoughts- He understands our thoughts. If you’ve ever been misunderstood when trying to express yourself to get help, you know how disheartening that incorrect interpretation can feel. The good news is right there, God doesn’t just know all, He understands all. If you find yourself in a position of needing or wanting someone’s advice, pray about it first. Xx

New Year, New We … Hey Bestie!

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Before 2022 arrives, I am making a public commitment to, well, us-me and you. You being both myself and the person reading this. I’m committing to show up consistently on The Hadaya, and to give you my best when I do. In my short 21 years of life I have endured quite a lot, and I always told myself that I would one day become the person that I needed when I was younger. And that is not to downplay or overlook my ever present village. However, as time goes on and the world changes, so should we and how we go about certain things.

I pray and hope that The Hadaya becomes a safe space for the inner black children who need it, as well as a space for those who don’t necessarily need it, but still want to be here.

Let me explain that.

I’m big on definitions. For two reasons. The first one simply being that I love to talk but I’m learning that the tongue truly has the power of life and death. The Bible says that “they that love it,” it meaning the action of using your voice, “shall eat the fruit thereof.” (Proverbs 18:21). Now if you’re like me and you’re fairly new to having your own personal relationship with God, that sentence may be confusing and overwhelming. This verse is simply telling us to be mindful of what comes out of our mouths because words hold power. Have you ever heard the phrase “you are what you eat,” as it pertains to our nutrition? Take this verse as “you are what you speak.” The second reason I like to know the exact meaning of what I say is because we live in a world where there are so many words and phrases; new ones being added each year. I feel that we the people have evolved and know so much that we assume we know what people are talking about. Take inner child for example, it sounds familiar but the phrase in actuality has nothing to do with being under 18, or being in touch with your “younger self,” as explained in psychology. Inner child is defined as a person’s supposed original or true self. So when I say that I want The Hadaya to be a safe space for the inner black child, I simply mean a safe space for your true and original self. And the black part simply because I’m a black woman and my inner child has had experiences that come with being black.

So cheers to 2022, cheers to the start and growth of The Hadaya, and cheers to the new we, bestie! Xx

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